Submarine Collision, I Can’t Shake You.

I’ve been trying to type for weeks now.

I sit down and type and type and type. I type about topics or just let it free flow but it all ends up the same, right back to my husband’s sub collision.

It’s frustrating. As much as I want to write about the collision a lot of it I can’t write about. Yeah know…the whole national security thing and all.

Dealing with this has been tough. My husband’s shore duty billet was submarine rescue. We talked a lot about the things that could happen and why, if ever, he would have to go and rescue a sub. So when he went back to sea duty and started doing deployments again I felt prepared. I felt that no matter what bad news could come my way I wouldn’t be taken by surprise. I felt confident in the Navy’s ability to support each other in times of need.

So when I got the news that his sub was in a collision I was slightly shocked. I remember thinking “Like a car accident kind of collision?” I know that sounds weird but it never crossed my mind that two Navy ships could run into each other. I still don’t understand how it happened.

Besides the kind of shocked confusion I felt, I wasn’t really worried about my husband’s safety. Don’t get me wrong, I was freaked out and really wished I could just be there with my husband to give him a hug but we were told know one was hurt. The more I found out about the collision they more freaked out I became though. I didn’t realize how big of a deal this collision really was until a few weeks after it happened.

As the pieces slowly came together for me and as my husband explained some of the information in the press release alone I was floored. I couldn’t believe this had happened. This anxiety and stress and the nervousness I feel will not be calmed until my husband is home and in my arms again. I know my husband is fine but until I see him, physically see him, and that’s he is safe will I be able to believe it.

While it slowly came together for me how dangerous this whole thing was, I think it was for the best that way. If I had known exactly how serious the collision was when I first received the news, I think I would have a break down. During times like these you see just how great God is and that he really doesn’t give you more then you can handle.

With homecoming hopefully approaching soon, I turn to my house to make preparations for my husband’s arrival. During the weeks to come I will be cleaning, planning surprises for him, and watching time go slowly by – hour by slow hour.